I do make a certain amount of fun about the weird stuff that happens in South Florida, so it's good to be reminded that equally weird stuff happens elsewhere, including deep in the heartland.
Take this story about John I. Rocko, B.A. in Criminology. According to the Toronto Blade, Police dog's bachelor's degree prods legal howling about chief, it seems that Mr. Rocko is in fact…a police dog. One with higher grades on his B.A. from mail-order degree mill Concordia University than his owner, Chief John McGuire of the Fostoria (Ohio) Police Department received:
While their courseloads were nearly identical, the dog received an A+ in “Structure and Process of the American Court System”; Chief McGuire got a B- in the same class, the transcripts show.
Who got Rocko the Police Dog a $499 B.A. isn't clear, nor are all the legal issues in the case that gave rise to the revelation — they seem to center around the allegation that the Chief's reliance on this dubious credential is one of several reasons why he was validly suspended at the time he purported to arrest the defendant.
Incidentally, a visit to the Concordia web site is enough to make you more than a little nervous. I was quite taken aback by this published testimonial:
I am impressed and delighted with the results of my investment as I have just received my Bachelor of Science degree in Nuclear Science. The transcripts exceed my expectations, my employer recognized the entire course curriculum as almost identical to his own traditional college transcripts. His initial skepticism about distance learning schools immediately disappeared when he got to verify the copies of your governmental registration papers that were included in my credentials package. Your program must be the fulfilment of every professional’s dream. Thank you so much for this fantastic opportunity.
I sure hope that's a fake, for the idea of a nuclear engineer running some power plant out there on the basis of a mail-order degree is enough to keep you awake at night.