I Am Against Classroom Autodefenestration

I'm working desultorily on a longer post about strange things that can happen in the classroom, which may be why this story in the Miami Herald leapt out at me over breakfast:

Teacher loses bet over leap out window: A 17-year-old boy jumped out of a second-floor window at Miami Beach High last week after betting his teacher he was strong enough to do it and not get hurt.

He won the bet, landing unharmed. No immediate word on whether he got any money out of it.

The teacher has been reassigned to a non-teaching job at a regional ACCESS Center while police and school officials investigate the incident.

The science class was in the middle of a lecture on evolution on Wednesday when the student — whose name was not released — began talking about jumping out the window to prove his point, according to the police report.

The teacher, Yrvan Tassy Jr., bet him $20 that he would hurt himself if he jumped, police said.

That's when the boy jumped out the window. He landed on his feet — in a patch of dirt and grass — and returned to the classroom, the police report stated. He asked Tassy for the $20, and Tassy said he'd bring it the next day, students told police.

Unlike some other incidents I have in mind, where I can feel sorry for the teacher, this one defies sympathy. I will take a firm stand on this complex question: Autodefenestration has no place in the classroom. Indeed, I'll even go on record against all forms of classroom defenestration, especially from above ground level.

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8 Responses to I Am Against Classroom Autodefenestration

  1. Mike Madison says:

    This brings back some curious memories. My high school English teacher, sophomore year, was a fan of involuntary defenestration for unruly students. The classroom was on the first floor. Abusive as he could be, he was also a memorable teacher of American literature. So far as I know, he was never disciplined by the administration (this was a private school, and all-male at the time), and he retired many years later as one of the most revered teachers in the institution.

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  5. Robert says:

    Well the question isn’t really if autodefenstration has a place in the classroom but whether it has a place flying out of the classroom to a grassy area. I

  6. Laura K says:

    I had strept throat the first year I taught public high school and was home on my couch when the principal called.

    “One of your students.” he said, “threw a desk out the window.” Now, we had those desks that are attached to their chairs, so I was quite impressed by this feat, though I didn’t say so to the principal.

    “Who did it?” I asked, instead.

    “The substititute didn’t see,” he replied.

    And believe it or not, we didn’t have any blind subs at the time.

    —–

  7. Justin Boden says:

    you used the ‘desultorily’ abverb, really? who in hell are you trying to impress?

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